Stripper Vicar

Dear Mavis I'm compelled to write this letter
In the hope that you may soon be getting better
I've a feeling you should go and see a doctor
If you haven't then you know you really oughta
I was worried so I went to see the vicar
But before I could confess he first confessed to be a stripper

Dear Mavis it was very strange to see him
So I thought I'd write and ask your opinion
Should I grass on him, report him to the cardinal
Or whether I should egg him on to turn professional
If I dob on him they'll call him plastic scouser
But the only thing the stripper wears is plastic trousers

Mavis' opinion is all we really seek
Should we lie while he's still alive
Cos when the vicar strips he gets away with it

Dear Mavis thought I'd follow up my letter
Drop a line about the fate of our poor vicar
Very tragically his time on earth is ended
Found him gagged and bound in stockings and suspenders
Dear Mavis if you tell us what our thoughts are
And I hope that they're not biased 'cos you are the vicar's daughter

And we know him as our vicar
And by night a part-time stripper
And the vicar got suspended
In his stockings and suspenders
And he's making wine from water
While he dresses like his daughter
And we know that he's a rip off
Cos we've seen him with his kit off

(Acknowledgement: Mansun)

Intuition

What gives, what helps

The intuition?

I'll know, I'll know.

I won't have to be shown

The way home

And it’s not about a boy,

Although, although

They can lead you, hide, or reveal too.

A destination known

Only by the one

Who's fate is overgrown

Peacefully can break your home

In a love that is not complete

With only heat

And it came a heatwave

A mercyful save

You choose, you chose

Poetry over prose

A map is more unreal

And where you've been

Or how you feel

And it's impossible to say

How important something was

And what you might have missed out on

And how it might have changed it all

Did I? Did I? Did I?